Alter-native's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[666Asdf]

"Asdf"? What kind of a lazy title is that?

You might as well call the sequel "666Zxcv" while you're at it. We see here a valiant warrior girl donning her battle ax, setting her sight out towards what will soon be a surely vicious battle. She does seem very confident however, as indicated by her smile which conveys a thirst for thrilling adventure. I see in the background, a grey skyline(made possible by a splendid photo shoot blended neatly into the landscape), and these dark sprigs of tall grass all darkend for very contrasty sort of image. I see a red spot on this grass: fresh blood? The music once again is atmospheric and ambient making this another welcome late night installment of the 666 series. Overall, nothing is wrong with this picture, it is a great piece of concept art. By the way, I notice that this midnight mistress you have featured in this piece has been featured in most of your other entries as well. She has sharp teeth, a lions tail, dark bushy hair, a tatoo on her arm, and a variety of weapons( one most specifically, an assault rifle). I go to your site, and find out her name is Dagger. Any backstory?

Sir-CannabisClock responds:

lots, I shall pm you perhaps!

[Falling Collab]

Transition Needs Work, Artists Need Discipline.

While have a swell slew of good mind on your creative conclave, you also have few lazy ones. The whole transition scroll needs retooling so every picture fits.

bjmdtcjw responds:

1. Don't insult the artists who worked hard on this.
2. The transition is fine and everyone likes it.
3. Do you even know how to use flash?

[666Contamination]

An Anticipated Return to the Core Roots of 666.

This is what makes the 666 gallery. A mysterious picture seen through a grainy camera lens effect. Music that is moody, yet so atmospheric and ever so slightly sleepy(Usually in the form of late night techno). A bizarre Science Fiction/Horror/Dark/Fantasy scenario with Exotic/Erotic elements. Not to mention, An acompanying night time mistress(Usually in the form of naked). Due to your mysteriousness and typically artistic quality of these works, we can't help but save these still frame non-animations from deletion. They also come with a cryptic message from the authors comments. However this certain entry has faults. Namely with the anatomy of your feminine model. Number one would be that she is a bit chubby on the thighs, just a bit 'kay, not too much. The next gripe comes with the perspective of the arms. I know what you are trying to do, you want to make the hands reach out towards us. Thats hard and I have trouble doing that too(but not that much). My tip would be to unthicken her left arm a bit(not too much now!). The key in drawing reaching arms is through proportion( hands have to be a wee bit bigger then the arm. Next thing is the breasts of this delicate creature. I can see her left boob, but her right boob looks awkrad, that is, if it is not her right shoulder, but I'll go with boob considering her stance which appears to be a side view. Her fingers need some polishing too. I find nothing wrong with her face whatsover. I do notice her tail by the way. I also notice regular human ears. Hmmmmm a half human half Lion Furry Hybrid crossbreed perhaps? Speaking of which, perhaps she doesn't have to be proportionate. Afterall, she could be a mutant victim from the radioactive after-effects of a nuclear war. That would probably explain the dusty/wintery, pale background and the tearful deformitees and angry/determined expression of this poor hybrid lass. Thats probably why the title is Contamination, because of the now entoxicating landscape rich with deposits of hot Uranium, maybe...I am pleased that the tradition of 666 is back in place. I wish you good luck on your next picture(s), make it a master piece.

Sir-CannabisClock responds:

This is quite possibly the best review ever written.

[go little dude!]

My Constructive Criticism for the Author

Don't use sticks. Try to master animation with other anatomical forms. Make them do the cool atheletic tricks you had the stick do. Use close ups and different camera angles too in later movies. Otherwise I say you have a decent animation for now.

xbutton responds:

thank you for the advice

I had already been thinking my next one would have full people rather than sticks.

[Awesome Video Games - Ep5]

Rad, but Fails in Demolishing My Gut with laughter

We have all laughed at terrible games before, but not so much at instructional videos that tried to help us in playing them. While Angry Video Game Nerd swears at bad games, these acid washed dudes try to give out tips and bounce back amatuerishly between gameplay footage and themselves in an embarassing fashion. This is very remiscent of those terrible videos youngsters had to sit through. Thank goodness we have gamesfaqs today. My gripe is that this video is a little too remiscent of those videos and it borders on reenactment rather then satire, but at least I really liked intro. You should do a segment where you parody the U.S. Videogame Team's technique for defeating this certain boss in Blaster Master(throw a grenade at it, hit pause as it explodes, and have the kids sit through aproximately 10 minutes of pause)

FarFromSubtle responds:

That sound slike one intense tip dude! Thanks for the awesome review, and thanks for watching!

[Happy Birthday Blue Hippo]

Nice...But I don't Understand...

Since when did you and Blue Hippo go sour? When I usually hear or see you guys, you are usually together as great friends. I remember you guys playing a prank on the grumpy Gost and laughing at him in the flash epic "Death of P-bot". You were(or at least in my eyes) two of the most radiant members from the Star Syndicate. Sometimes when I would look through your reviews, I would see you guys giving each other constuctive criticism like all good NGers. What has turned you two into bitter foes?
Now as for your the flash, it begins with Blue Hippo recieving a birthday present from Zecky. However, the note attached does not contain a warm message of love and affection, but a sour flaming insult. Still, Hippo decides to take a curious peek and ....BWAAAAH! It's a Piclownjew attack! Hippo then runs for his dear life from the nasty little bugger.
Overall, the characters were drawn and painted well for an above average quality, and the story pacing ran smoothing. My only gripe was that this was a bit short, but I am sure Blue Hippo will like this birthday flash none the less.

ZekeySpaceyLizard responds:

lmao wow you totally missed the point if you think me and hippo dont like each other

[Mecho man]

Needs a Little Work.

My advice would be to improve your artstyle, try to define your ability to shade objects so that you can make a laser look more like a laser and less like a solid noodle. Keep in mind that a laser is basically light so incorporate a glow effect. Next I would advise you to improve the animations a bit from this. The funny thing about this is that I have a feeling that the ordinary joe at the end is going to use the watch and live out his life as a wacky superhero, but thats just a hunch. Something in this tells me you play Metroid, but thats a hunch as well.

Chag responds:

Good advice on how to improve the noodle beam, and yes I have improved a fair bit since I first made it so I do use things like shading and voice acting now :P

And my god you were right on in both hunches, Average joe Billy most certainly becomes Mecho man and yes needless to say I was quite into Metroid before I made this and the various tracks seem to suit it quite well.

Thanks for the feedback :)

[UU - Rupee is a Furry]

Ho Hum, It's Been Done.

This "Rupee Clock is a furry" joke has already been said and done to death. I may not have much knowledge of the backstory behind the joke, but I've heard it before. I thought the prancing image of Rupee Clock with fox ears and a tail claiming "I'm a Furry." was hilarious, but alas it has become old and recycled, just like Phoenix Wrong and Toof. I found the image of Rupee Clock to have been professionaly painted and put together with swell presentation, but this film is too short. Besides, a pseudo-spiritual "oblivion" background may look nice, but it is far too easy to make.

ShroomUzi responds:

RUPEE CLOCK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THERE WERE NO CLOCKS IN THIS MOVIE

[F.E.A.R.]

Mon Review Pour le Parodie du F.E.A.R.

Les graphiques sont de bon qualitie, mais ils sont sur standarde.
La violence est exploitive et tres grande.
La humour est sick et twisted, J'aime les scenes avec la fille mysterioux. J'aime le scene avec le bullet time follie. Summarie, un amatuer anime' parodie de la plus magnifique prime perception jouex du video de l'action genre.

colomir responds:

hein ?! es-tu Yoda !? :) :P (joke)